Tuesday, May 19, 2009

How To Make A Firing Squad Execute Me

Get 10 - 15 bottles of a new flavor of Gatorade that most people haven't heard of yet. Get the same number of rifles as there are bottles of Gatorade. Load the rifles.

On the rifles, install metal "water cages" of the type found on bicycles. Put the bottles of Gatorade in the water cages.

Set me up on a busy street in the middle of the day, ideally against a brick wall. Offer a free Gatorade to anyone who would like to be in the firing squad. Keep offering until as many people accept as there are Gatorade rifles.

Line all the people up in front of me and make them execute me. A film crew might make this look more legitimate, but I think enough people would do it anyway.

After that I don't care, everyone can do whatever the fuck they want.

3 comments:

daniel bailey said...

the tiger woods gatorade has sniper eyes on the bottle.

http://mnr.onthescene.com/Gatorade/images_G/32_Tiger_TF_Loose_web.gif

Mark Reep said...

Just read 'The Intercom'; great story. Nice to see you're blogging again.

Amanda said...

Nice on the Tiger Woods bottle. I hadn't noticed that, because I stick to the classic orange Gatorade myself.

Mark, thanks for checking in! It's good to see you too.